A unity candle ceremony is a wedding tradition in which two people light a single candle together, symbolizing their commitment to a shared future. Whether you're planning a wedding or preparing to officiate one, here's how the ritual works, what it means, and how to incorporate it into the ceremony.
Key Takeaways
- A unity candle ceremony uses two individual candles to light one larger candle, symbolizing the joining of two lives in marriage.
- Unity candle ceremonies are common in Christian weddings but can also be adapted for secular and interfaith celebrations.
- The ritual typically lasts 3-5 minutes and often takes place after the wedding vows or ring exchange.
- Parents, children, and other loved ones can participate in the candle lighting.
- Officiants can use the ULC's free Candle Lighting Wedding Ceremony Script to incorporate the ritual into a complete wedding ceremony.
What Is a Unity Candle Ceremony?
A unity candle ceremony, also called a wedding candle lighting ceremony, is a symbolic ritual in which a couple uses two smaller candles to light one larger candle, known as the unity candle.
The two smaller flames represent the individuals entering marriage, while the central flame symbolizes their new life together. The ritual typically includes a short reading, blessing, or explanation from the wedding officiant.
Although unity candles are especially common in Christian weddings, couples of different faiths and beliefs can incorporate the tradition into their celebrations.
The ritual is one of several popular unity wedding ceremonies that couples can choose to personalize their special day.
What Does a Unity Candle Symbolize?
The unity candle represents love, commitment, and the joining of two lives. Each individual flame symbolizes a person's unique identity, while the shared flame represents the partnership they are creating through marriage.
Some couples leave their individual candles burning after lighting the central candle, symbolizing how they maintain their individuality while building a life together.
Others extinguish the smaller candles to emphasize their new union. Neither approach is required, and the symbolism is ultimately up to the couple.
In religious weddings, the flame may represent God's presence or blessings upon the marriage. In secular ceremonies, it can symbolize mutual support, shared goals, and a commitment to facing life's challenges together.
What Do You Need for a Unity Candle Ceremony?
A traditional unity candle setup requires only a few supplies:
- One large unity candle: The central candle that the couple lights together.
- Two smaller candles: Often called taper candles, these represent the individuals entering marriage.
- Candleholders: Three stable holders or a specially designed unity candle stand.
- A lighter or matches: To light the individual candles before the ritual begins.
- A safe, stable surface: A table or stand positioned where the couple and guests can see the ceremony.
Some couples decorate their unity candle with their names, wedding date, flowers, or other meaningful details. Check that any decorations are safely separated from the flames.
Officiant tip: Test the candle arrangement during the wedding rehearsal. Confirm that the venue allows open flames and follow the National Fire Protection Association's candle safety guidelines.
How to Perform a Unity Candle Ceremony in 5 Steps
A candle lighting wedding ceremony is simple to perform and generally takes just a few minutes. Here's a step-by-step guide for couples and officiants.
Step 1: Prepare the Unity Candle Setup
Before the wedding begins, place the large unity candle between the two smaller candles on a stable table.
Make sure the candles are accessible and positioned away from flammable decorations, loose fabric, and drafts. Assign someone to light the two smaller candles before the ritual, or include their lighting as part of the ceremony.
Step 2: Introduce the Candle Lighting Ritual
At the appropriate moment, the officiant invites the couple to approach the unity candle.
The officiant briefly explains the ritual's meaning to the guests, emphasizing how the two individual flames represent the couple's lives before marriage.
Step 3: Light the Individual Candles
If the two smaller candles are not already burning, the couple lights them.
Alternatively, parents or other loved ones can light the candles before the couple approaches. This variation can symbolize the love and support of the families who helped shape their lives.
Step 4: Light the Unity Candle Together
Each partner carefully holds one smaller candle. They bring their flames toward the center and light the larger unity candle.
The officiant may offer a blessing, recite a short reading, or allow the moment to unfold in silence.
The couple can then return the smaller candles to their holders, leaving them lit or extinguishing them according to their preferred symbolism.
Step 5: Conclude the Ritual
Once the unity candle is burning, the officiant offers a few closing words about the couple's commitment.
The couple then returns to their places, and the wedding ceremony continues with the next element. Be sure a designated person safely extinguishes the candles afterward.
When Does the Unity Candle Ceremony Take Place?
The unity candle ceremony most commonly takes place after the exchange of vows or wedding rings, but there is no fixed requirement.
Here's an example of how it can fit into a traditional wedding ceremony:
- Processional and welcome
- Opening remarks or readings
- Declaration of intent and wedding vows
- Exchange of rings
- Unity candle ceremony
- Pronouncement of marriage
- First kiss and recessional
Some couples prefer to light the unity candle earlier, particularly when family members are involved. The ideal timing depends on the couple's wishes and the overall ceremony structure.
Officiants can consult the ULC's guide on how to write a wedding ceremony script to organize the different elements.
For additional guidance on preparing and performing wedding ceremonies, the ULC Minister Store offers By the Power Vested in You, a handbook featuring sample scripts, ceremony planning tips, and practical officiant instructions.
What Does the Officiant Say During a Unity Candle Ceremony?
The officiant typically introduces the ritual, explains its symbolism, and offers a brief message as the couple lights the central candle.
The wording can be romantic, religious, spiritual, or entirely secular, depending on the couple's preferences.
Rather than writing everything from scratch, officiants can use the ULC's free Candle Lighting Wedding Ceremony Script, which incorporates the ritual into a complete wedding ceremony.
The script includes introductory remarks, vows, the candle lighting, and the pronouncement of marriage. It can be customized or downloaded for use on the wedding day.
For a more personalized ceremony, try the ULC's Wedding Script Generator, which allows officiants to combine different ceremony elements, including candle lighting.
Can Family Members Participate in a Unity Candle Ceremony?
Yes. Involving family members can make the ceremony especially meaningful.
Parents or guardians: Each partner's parents may light one of the smaller candles, symbolizing the families and relationships that helped shape the couple's lives.
Children: In a blended-family wedding, children may take part in the ritual with appropriate adult supervision, celebrating the creation of a new family.
Other loved ones: Grandparents, siblings, close friends, or other important people can also be included.
There is no required number of participants. The ceremony can be adapted to reflect the relationships the couple wishes to honor.
Make Their Special Day Official With the ULC
A unity candle ceremony is a simple way to celebrate the joining of two lives. With thoughtful preparation and meaningful wording, couples and officiants can turn this small ritual into a memorable moment.
Have a friend or family member getting married? You can help make their big day official! Get ordained online for free through the Universal Life Church and begin preparing to officiate their wedding.
For first-time officiants, the ULC's Classic Wedding Set includes official ordination credentials, commemorative marriage certificates, and the By the Power Vested in You handbook to help you prepare for the ceremony. Be sure to verify local officiant requirements before the wedding.
Unity Candle Ceremony FAQs
How Long Does a Unity Candle Ceremony Take?
Most unity candle ceremonies last approximately 3-5 minutes, depending on the officiant's remarks, the number of participants, and whether music or additional readings are included.
Do You Have to Be Religious to Have a Unity Candle Ceremony?
No. Although unity candles are common in Christian weddings, the ritual can also be adapted for secular or interfaith ceremonies. Couples can choose wording that reflects their own beliefs and values.
Who Lights the Unity Candle at a Wedding?
Traditionally, the couple lights the central candle together using two smaller candles. Parents, children, or other loved ones may participate in lighting the individual candles.
Do You Blow Out the Individual Candles?
Either choice is acceptable. Some couples extinguish the smaller candles to symbolize their union, while others leave them burning to represent their continued individuality within the marriage. All candles should be safely extinguished when the ritual is over.
Can You Have a Unity Candle Ceremony Outdoors?
Yes, although wind can make outdoor candle lighting difficult. Consider using protective candle enclosures or suitable flameless alternatives, depending on the venue's rules.
Couples may also choose a different symbolic ritual, such as a unity sand ceremony or a shared ceremonial drink. The Monastery offers a Unity Shot Wedding Script that can be adapted to include a nonalcoholic beverage.
Is a Unity Candle Ceremony Legally Required?
No. Unity candle lighting is a symbolic wedding tradition, not a legal requirement for marriage.
Officiants must still follow the applicable laws governing marriage solemnization and marriage licenses. Before the wedding, review the ULC's state marriage laws guide and confirm any additional local requirements.
