You hear the word soulmate bandied about a lot these days. Often it comes out of the mouth of a bride who believes, or at least wants to believe, that she is marrying the love of her life with whom she’ll live happily ever after. Or it comes out of the mouth of a groom who believes, or at least wants to believe, that he will continue to love his bride, and vice versa, for the rest of their lives. Considering that many of these couples wind up in divorce court within five years, one has to wonder about the meaning of the word soulmate.
Taking the word literally, a soulmate is someone whose soul is a mate to yours — not a clone of your soul with exactly the same attributes, but a mate for your soul with different attributes that possibly complement your own soul. In other words, your soulmate is not your mirror image. Instead he or she is a — some would say the — person who interconnects with you on the deepest of levels.
Some people recognize their soulmate as the result of an intense, impassioned, and whirlwind romance. Other people fail to recognize their soulmate right away, instead finding the person only after a relatively long relationship shows them that their life is infinitely better than it was before his or her love came on the scene.
Some indications that you have — or have not yet — met your soulmate include the following:
- The person is your best friend.
- He or she is your spiritual catalyst.
- The individual is your confidant and teacher.
- He or she feels familiar to you, sort of like coming home when you weren’t sure home even existed.
- You vibrate on most of the same core frequencies.
- You communicate not only through words, but also through just a look, a gesture, or a facial expression.
- The person isn’t perfect but is truly worthwhile deep down.
- You have an intense connection, whether or not you’re physically together.
- He or she is the person most connected to your thoughts and emotions.
- You can usually intuit each other’s thoughts and feelings without having to be told.
- This loved one can bring thoughts and emotions out of you that you didn’t even know were there.
- He or she is the person with whom you live, or at least interact, on the deepest of levels, which may make your relationship extremely volatile, ranging from the highest of highs to the lowest of lows.
It is tempting to think that if you have met your true soulmate, that relationship will last for the rest of your life. While this sometimes happens, as evidenced by loving marriages that have thrived rather than merely endured for decades on end, this is not always the case. Unfortunately, sometimes the inherent volatility of a soulmate relationship can cause it to end, bringing about intense emotional upheaval for both parties. Often in broken soulmate relationships, the couple continues to feel unending love for each other even though they can no longer live together.
It is also tempting to think that your soulmate is someone you’re destined to meet no matter what. If you stop to think about it, however, you cannot possibly meet and recognize your soulmate if you have not yet “met” and recognized your own soul. First you must know yourself; i.e., get to know who you truly are as opposed to who you may be attempting to present to your family, friends, and colleagues. Once you do, then you are in that good place where you are open to meeting your true soulmate.
Many use the term soulmate to describe a passionate love. Now that you understand the true definition of the word, think about how it applies to your life and your relationships.